Snippets of Clarity

Covert

2011-11-26T10:12:00.001-06:00

The seam ripper is a vicious little bastard. It knows when it is needed and finds ways to obfuscate its location. Knowing that it is a custom tool that cannot be replaced, it hides in its smugness.

Lung

2011-10-16T08:11:00.001-05:00

The chunky brown bandmade my lungs cough and wheezeThis is Baton Rouge.

Drift

2011-03-04T09:22:00.000-06:00

She had the uncanny ability to fall asleep in the strangest of places or inopportune moments. All her life she fought sleep during meetings, lectures, reading work related articles. Sometimes she couldn't control it and would wake up in the middle of a lecture with her hand still moving attempting to take notes. Listening to audio books on road trips guaranteed that within 3 minutes her head would be rolling back with her mouth agape as she lightly snored. Holding still for long was asking for trouble. On the other side of the coin, staying asleep during regular "approved" sleep hours was nearly impossible.

Lint

2011-03-01T21:17:00.001-06:00

How is it that all my friends can feel unfulfilled and frustrated all at the same time? People not even located geographically near one another and who don't even know one another. Perhaps it is the end of winter doldrums; the anticipation of spring. At some point there has to be an end, hopefully a good end. A bright new day. The imagined scenarios of doom and gloom can only continue for so long before something breaks. Possibly me or my heart.

Lolisms

2011-01-07T09:00:00.000-06:00

When dealing with a serious case of the goof offs, it is best to go with it and enjoy any stolen moments from real work by clicking NSWF links and leaving rude comments in all social media outlets of which you are a member.

Dessert

2010-12-20T12:20:00.003-06:00

The highway dirt created a golden brown layer on the snow drifts that looked like the perfect meringue. Mmm, pie.

Recline

2010-10-30T10:10:00.000-05:00

Reclining on the couch with coffee in hand
I enjoy the cool fall breeze and sunny morning
listening to thoughts whirling in my head

Ebb

2010-10-08T17:33:00.004-05:00

Turning left against traffic onto Blue Mound Road on a Friday is like finding the rhythm in jump rope.

Crush

2010-09-12T08:31:00.000-05:00

One standing argument revolved around canned, stewed tomatoes. To crush or not to crush? One felt it wasn't worth the effort, the other took extreme umbrage to the giant globular red orbs in the final product.

Of course, the non-tomato squasher would never give into the pleadings of the pro-squasher. And so the argument continued into perpetuity.

Gratis

2010-09-05T07:39:00.002-05:00

The grackle and cricket were proud to offer their tandem wake-up call service to the pre-dawn world. Never realizing the services went unappreciated by the recipients.

Resistance

2010-06-19T21:06:00.000-05:00

The long green therapy band expertly wedged in the back door unintentionally, yet successfully foiled the intruder.

Easy

2010-06-10T23:41:00.002-05:00

Effluent, effervescent, ellusive...sleep is ellusive, not enveloping, not earnest or eager. Ellusive.

Clue

2010-06-10T07:00:00.002-05:00

The wheezy snicker reinforced the arrogant personality of the bureaucrat.

Transition

2010-06-05T15:09:00.000-05:00

Adjusting from being support staff to being a professional is tricky. How far is too far? When should permission be sought? Hopefully things will get clearer over time.

Cuff

2010-05-30T08:33:00.004-05:00

Sunday morning, 2:45 AM

Left Shoulder: Honey, you awake? (increases throbbing pain) Honey, you AWAKE??

Self: Ouch, what?

Left Shoulder: You’ve been taking me for granted lately and I see how you’ve been hanging out with that Right Hand, opening doors, pouring milk. Don’t think I haven’t noticed.

Self: Baby, you know I’m nothing without you. You remember how bad it was before we agreed to start seeing an orthopedist together? C’mon Dear, you know you’re my dominant hand. Right Hand I are just friends. I’ve only been using Right Hand to give you a break.

What do you say we go have a strawberry yogurt together and take a full dose of NSAIDs?

Left Shoulder: (hesitates and answers begrudgingly)
Well, Okay, that would be nice.

(sounds of dishes clattering and water running)

Self: ‘night Dear

Left Shoulder: (menacingly) Maybe…

Sunday morning, 6:45 AM

Left Shoulder: I can still control how you sleep, you know?

Self: Yes, I know. I’ve only been able to sleep flat on my back for the past three months. You are in complete control. I can’t wait until we’re fully back on track, Babe. I love you.

Left Shoulder: Coffee?

Self: (mutters under breath) Since you won’t let me sleep, why not?

Freedom

2010-05-29T20:17:00.002-05:00

Little things can add up into a prison. Hindsight changes perspective.

Disassociation

2010-05-05T16:01:00.001-05:00

Recording daily events, writing down the time meds are taken helps maintain a thread to real life. A tenuous strand.

Xoco

2010-05-03T17:48:00.001-05:00

Rich, pungent, savory and creamy. Great play of textures between the crunchy bread and silky cheese. Full use of garlic. Heaven! Chili sauce is salty and tangy; I wouldn't call it hot.

Cloister

2010-04-18T06:30:00.001-05:00

Although cloistering away was in immediate response to an untenable situation, there really were no other options at the time. Confrontation was useless and painful. It was important to recognize the greater good. Children should not be exposed to the seething rage which had developed. Pretending to act normal was getting old, incredibly old. What was the point anyway? Just a pretense for the kids. Best to hide away in the safe confines of the master bedroom.

Being holed up in one's own house was not particularly enjoyable. Feelings of resentment and frustration were overwhelming at times. Best to suck it up, push it down and await the inevitable change. It was bound to be resolved at some point. Patience was the key. Breathing deep; going for a run; calling a friend; all stop-gap measures to enduring the pain that was soon to end upon separation. Time to live life as one preferred and not in deference to another.

Cryptid

2010-04-17T16:39:00.002-05:00

Cryptid

When it is quiet and the noises of the apartment can be heard, there is sometimes a distant howl emanating from the kitchen. Further investigation has determined it comes from within the freezer. What makes that sad wailing sound?

It is a miniature Yeti toiling day and night to make ice for me and my family. He/She is a hard working Mini-Yeti, and on occasion releases a bellow indicating another successful batch of ice has been created. Mini-Yeti are proud folk requiring much praise. If the mini-Yeti does not receive proper praise for its voluminous output of ice cubes, it may stop working.

Thank you great Mini-Yeti for the ice you have provided, we are humbled by your output.

Above

2010-02-28T18:29:00.003-06:00

The clouds were highlighted by the setting sun. They gave the appearance of a test pad for a bristle brush.

Perception

2010-01-12T18:20:00.002-06:00

"The Wheels Are Falling Off the World" is not only a catchy tune but also describes my current perception of life.

Audible

2009-12-12T20:52:00.002-06:00

Sound. We take it for granted. Turn off the TV and the radio and listen to the vegetables simmering under the broiler, the clock ticking, the dogs barking. Turn them off and hear the thoughts inside your head. Turn them off and find the peaceful silence that awaits us all.

Audio

2009-11-25T19:09:00.002-06:00

When riding public transit remember to appreciate the tinny screech of teh evil Rap music as well as the phone conversations ragarding baby mammas and such.

Golden

2009-11-25T06:49:00.002-06:00

The normally blue buildings glowed defiantly in the dawn, propped up like gold bars on their sides.

Discrete

2009-11-16T12:34:00.003-06:00

The distinct, sudden jolt was based solely on the shock of being apart. The severing of the physical connection did not affect the bond which had grown so strong.

Flight

2009-11-04T15:56:00.002-06:00

Five hawks circle the sky at varying altitudes reminiscent of the flight patterns at an airport.

Scene

2009-10-21T07:53:00.004-05:00

The gentle drops slowly changed the view into a Cezanne, to Pissarro, then Monet, followed by Dali. The wipers returned it back to Estes.

Convalesce

2009-10-13T16:25:00.004-05:00

When home sick in bed, the bedroom should be designed like a theater set. Meaning various portions of the room can be rolled away and new ones rolled in to change the mood and scenery. Different lighting would also be beneficial. In fact, wouldn't it be great if those healing lights were added to give you the vitamin D a recuperating body needs?

Additionally, those whisking away various portions of the room should be strong, healthy and appropriately clothed. I'm thinking form fitting jeans and t-shirts. Of course in all black. Shorts might do, depending on length and fittedness. Be a good techie won't you and refill my water?

Traverse

2009-09-07T20:22:00.003-05:00

There are surprises that await just around the corner. Taking a walk around one's neighborhood on a late summer's evening can reveal many interesting facts. Perhaps a neighbor will leave the blinds open with the light on providing a view of a garishly green painted wall covered with a purple spiral, not unlike a Tim Burton movie.

Next, instead of playing catch with a football, you will encounter an entire family standing around watching and commenting on two young men playing hit-my-cousin-on-the-back-of-the-head-and-you-do-the-same for half-time entertainment.

Furthermore, it should be noted that a quick walk in the barefooted Hillbilly style is a bad idea after a pedicure; feet can be very tender.

Turnabout

2009-07-30T07:41:00.002-05:00

Perhaps a reversal in thinking from running away to running towards will produce a better result.

Tower

2009-07-27T09:36:00.003-05:00

When there are no glimmers of morning sun in the sky, the glass buildings become menacing unwelcoming towers looming overhead. Without the glimmer of sunlight, the colors change from easter-egg happy to murky blue-gray-green frown.

Running

2009-07-19T12:57:00.002-05:00

Initially, it was literally running away from problems. One of the few ways to feel freedom and control. The need created a healthy body for a temporarily broken spirit. Grappling with the emotions and gaining acceptance of the situation reduced the need to escape. Now the spirit had strengthened, but the body had become weaker.

The loss of urgency, the desire to push it, the will to conquer had abated. There had to be a reason for this shift in perception, a way to get back to the fortifying regimen that created a lithe, capable physical form without reverting to the previously shattered self.

Both mind and body need to be in balance, yet it can be difficult to maintain. The spirit missed the freedom and control it was being denied and it wanted it back. A solution needed to be found and the situation remedied, it was the only way.

Return

2009-07-15T08:06:00.003-05:00

Getting back into the swing of things after time away from work is a tricky endeavor. Perhaps the buzz from a incredible vacation has yet to wear off. The brain is stuck in a loop of remembering the amazing sights, sounds and feelings and isn't ready to relinquish them in return for the groove of the everyday. One trick is to come back mid-week in order to make the transition less painful. It is important to hold in the warm feelings for as long as possible and let the joy trickle into normal life. Otherwise, the time has been wasted.

Unaware

2009-07-12T07:21:00.000-05:00

The stranger on the street had no clue she was issuing incredibly insensitive insults during the casual conversation struck up on the way to the bus stop. Even when a friendly, gentle, yet fairly obvious hint was provided indicating it was time to move the topic in a different direction, the offending comments continued. There was no point in getting upset or angry at the clueless human, it was not intentional, in fact it was very funny to think that someone could continue to lead the conversation in such a derogatory fashion and be completely unaware.

Air

2009-07-04T09:19:00.003-05:00

In Texas, the summertime is when cabin fever kicks in. This may be a hard concept for those who live farther north, it is the same though. Fantasies of being able to go outside and take a long walk, mow the grass after 10 am or cook over fire without incurring heat-stroke begin to take over thought processes. One starts to feel trapped inside air-conditioned, bland, static interiors after a few weeks.

A by-product of these climate controlled interiors is the overcompensation for the heat which creates chilly iceboxes requiring sweaters and jackets to survive the blasting cold air. The wardrobe worn to survive the outside is perfectly inappropriate for the iceberg conditions of a public space. Cute painted toenails and summery dresses get covered with loafers and grandma sweaters once inside.

When the desire to go outside becomes too strong and a game plan is devised for surviving the elements, the air-quality must also be taken into account. The heat traps the pollution inside a warm, toxic cocoon. This causes all sorts of problems. Breathing the air, even blinking can make your throat and eyes burn. A clump of yuck begins to form between the lungs and throat. The transition between the heat of outside and the cold of inside combined with pollutant filled sinus cavities produces headaches that can last the length of the summer.

Going to the mailbox becomes a brave action. Grocery shopping must be done early in the morning or after sunset. The hours between 10 am and 8 pm are to be spent inside, holding still under a fan, preferably with a beer in one hand and a TV remote in the other. When this gets old, firing up the laptop is a good alternative if you have a way to redirect the heat off of your lap.

Sweaty thighs are so last century.

Lack

2009-06-25T08:09:00.004-05:00

Sometimes the ability to properly design a spreadsheet is missing. This generally indicates a lack of caffeine, sleep or both. Perhaps a browsing of the Internet, a stick of gum or a newly sharpened pencil with a nice eraser added on top is called for in order to reset brainwaves and regain focus. All three simultaneously would be exquisite.

Cacophony

2009-06-19T16:25:00.003-05:00

The deathmetal punctuated with the mobile phone ring tone of Greensleeves was a disquieting combination.

Rewards

2009-06-19T07:27:00.003-05:00

The thrill that comes from unexpected good surprises is so rewarding. The extra discount at checkout; a pair of pants once verging on obscenely tight being looser; an employee's completion of a project to perfection and ahead of schedule; finding cash in the laundry. Little reminders that life is so sweet.

Condiments

2009-06-11T11:42:00.003-05:00

The hidden jar of unopened gourmet strawberry preserves from the departmental breakfast was discovered by one enterprising staff member. It served them well as an accompaniment to countless peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and always found its way to the back of the fridge behind the 7 month old burrito.

Friends

2009-06-07T20:31:00.003-05:00

The loss of friends is never easy and frequently confusing. The cold-shoulder is never a pleasant experience. Sometimes, you just have to let it go, regardless of the effort put into building the relationship. The inability to control another’s reaction can be maddening and yet it’s a fact of life; hard to take nonetheless.

What is really frustrating is when the friendship ends unexpectedly. Like a cold glass of water in the face. One day everything is hunky dory, the next you are battling feelings of anger and befuddlement. As with most interpersonal exchanges, lack of communication is the master of the derail. When that is combined with external interference, the situation is doomed.

It's no fun to think all of the ideas exchanged and goodwill can vanish in the blink of an eye. But it can and does. Heartbreaking.

Homecoming

2009-06-06T13:58:00.002-05:00

In the perfect world, fantasyland if you will, a five to ten minute moratorium on conversation would be observed when one comes home from work. No permissions should be sought, questions asked, or opinions on dinner should be solicited. The one exception would be a brief salutation; acknowledgement of arrival.

Time to place one’s belongings in their appropriate location, emptying of the bladder, change of clothes should be granted to the recently arrived individual. The transition from work to home is best done quietly alone in an unhurried fashion. If said moratorium were practiced consistently a cheerfulness and agreeability as never before witnessed would become the norm.

Having to constantly excuse oneself from a conversation to attend to pressing personal needs only creates terse replies and growing impatience, followed by feelings of guilt for pulling away from important people.

It is further recommended that limited conversation in the morning be observed. Questions requiring thoughtful feedback or any sort of need for compassion are a risky endeavor at best.

In conclusion, attentiveness to other’s reaction and modifying communication to best fit the situation would improve the chance of receiving positive feedback. The lack of response merely indicates one who operates at a different level of verbosity and perhaps finds input overwhelming at certain times of the day.

Opponent

2009-05-29T07:00:00.002-05:00

Allergy season, which runs from April to March is a resentful, chameleonic bastard. From mildly-irritating scratchy throat to eyelids of sandpaper, he loves to play tricks. When feeling particularly hateful he likes to cause days upon days of headaches or create the feeling of being beat about the shoulders with a baseball bat. The body’s immune-system reaction is the least successful against this fine opponent. Its favorite response: play dead, creating an overpowering need to lay down for hours at a time in discombobulated slumber as the Eustachian tubes fill with fluid, triggering the brain to believe it's falling. Fine work.

Flavor

2009-05-26T13:44:00.001-05:00

It could be that the combination of baked beans and potato salad is the most perfect mix of savory and sweet ever created; if it weren’t for the mind blowing combination of hummus eaten with potato chips, which is strictly savory-on-savory, the prior combination would win hands-down. Hummus should be worshipped as a goddess or have a national holiday. Quite possibly both.

It should be noted that savory on savory sounds somewhat provocative.

Anger

2009-05-23T07:00:00.000-05:00

Wondering what makes one so angry with life when there is so much beauty and joy to be had, if only you allow it.

Agility

2009-05-20T07:00:00.000-05:00

Some children are ready to try anything. Others are so very timid. When it comes to physical prowess, fearlessness, or at least a willingness to try in spite of the fear, comes into play. The true daredevils are the ones who always wind up in the emergency room worrying their parents to no end. They have no fear, but do they have the common sense or agility to save them from themselves?

For some it is hard to understand the timid child. What is stopping them? They are mostly immune to the effects of gravity, unlike the brittle old. Perhaps it is the parent cringing and yelling from the sidelines to be careful, or pulling them aside to warn them about the dangers of having fun. Pity that.

The confidence that comes from the freedom of being able to conquer fears and succeed through agility and strength cannot be denied. Of course, not all are designed with this ability. Sometimes it is easy to spot the adults who were unable to experience success in this manner.

Unlike

2009-05-18T07:00:00.000-05:00

The human imagined itself as an insightful and giving healer. A true listener; warrior for the under served; voice of the people. Other humans saw it as argumentative, uncooperative and manipulative. The disconnect between self-perception and others' perception of someone is a fascinating study. How do the two become so far off? If in fact, someone were to address the issue, would it make a positive impact on the behavior, or would it only create resentment and increase difficulties?

Gift

2009-05-16T07:00:00.001-05:00

There really was no point to it, except to shame and humiliate. In the grand scheme of things, what good was that? The attention-grabbing stunt was a common theme. The craving to be noticed, to be better. Gaudy displays of pseudo-wealth were recognized as just that, even the children had that part figured out.

The real pay-off was the appreciation and recognition of true love that had nothing to do with a price tag. The smiles and laughter of a shared happiness and bond negated the temporary distraction.

Gaze

2009-05-14T12:17:00.005-05:00

The morning started as usual. Somewhere in the midst of morning rituals, the desire to pack up a few supplies and head off to the hills became overwhelming. Perhaps it was the nomadic sound of the music. It should have been a day of hiking, wandering and gazing off into the distance.

No words were needed, but a sketchbook would be required. At the top of the hill, perhaps a beer or two with some food, followed by a nap in the sun. The walk back would consist of fulfilling exhaustion and experiencing the temperature and light change as the sun tucked down into the horizon.

Even later in the day, the feeling was there. The shoulders, heart, head and down the tops of the arms felt as if they were full of bubble-gum. What was that sensation? The need for a warm embrace from a lover was how it felt. Perhaps that was it. Desire.

Senses

2009-05-10T19:50:00.005-05:00

Clear skies led to a mild evening of fragrant green scents with pink clouds and a disturbing smell of gunpowder that must have been BBQ gone awry.

Harsh

2009-05-09T14:56:00.000-05:00

The cold hard impenetrable wall
My cloaking device

It is high, gray and seamless
There are no toe-holds or finger-jams

No light shines in or out, although it is invisible
It is there to protect me

Not everyone can see it
But you can

Sometimes I want out
To reach through to the other side
To touch you

But it won’t let me
It is built too well

Regeneration

2009-05-07T07:31:00.003-05:00

All roads lead to thirty years of mismanagement. Ineffectual lolly-gagging, pocketsing of the hands, shaking one's head as if in deep thought and creation of reports with erroneous statistics left the organism in a near-death state. Changes to the environment bred highly-functioning cells which were overtaking the cancerous ones. These cells were tasked with regenerating an almost completely malignant entity. It was not going to be simple, painless or gentle.

Bass

2009-05-05T06:33:00.003-05:00

The car sidled up with soul-jarring thumps and rattles. The expectation was misogynistic hate-filled music, the reality was Steve Miller's Joker.

Toad

2009-05-03T09:00:00.000-05:00

She was unaware of her affect on others. What she perceived as pointed and fairly humorous comments were actually received as negative, passive-aggressive nagging. Why was she always called aside to discuss "interpersonal communication styles" and why do these people talk in such bullshit terms anyway?

Were they incapable of recognizing her keen insight? She had a thing or two to teach them, even if they were professionals who had years of experience in a field in which she was new. She saw the truth as no one else could. Her remarks were intended to show her intelligence and expose their ignorance and faults. Surely they would want to know.

The reason she was always the first to be let go in troubled times was due to her lack of seniority, there was no doubt about that in her mind.

Light

2009-05-01T07:00:00.000-05:00

Recently holidays and other celebrations had taken on a different tone. The dread and negative undercurrent had vanished. The forced pretense of happiness that was no longer required made a significant difference. Like the return of the sun after a long winter of rain, the ability to enjoy had returned.

Slick

2009-04-29T10:31:00.000-05:00

The drive into work generally occurred before the sun had risen. On rainy mornings the roads and sky were black. Reflections of the street lights made sleek shiny patterns through the water on the windshield. It was a surreal experience where there was no time, only liquid and light.

In the springtime there were a few days before the time change when the sunrise lit the towers creating a wondrous blue-on-blue composition of glass against sky. This was a moment when cresting the hill into downtown was like a lucid dream.